Sunday, September 12, 2010
Slumber in the Belly of the Beast
In the sub-zero wasteland of the planet Hoth,
only the strong survive...
and of course those lucky Jedi protected
by the thick skin of a Tauntaun.
Now after exhaustive movie viewing research
and analysis ThinkGeek Labs has isolated the exact
synthetic compounds needed to re-create Tauntaun fur.
What have we done with this supreme knowledge?
Created a Tauntaun sleeping bag of course.
This high-quality sleeping bag looks just like a Tauntaun,
complete with saddle, printed internal intestines,
and a plush lightsaber zipper pull.
Now when your kids tell you their favorite
Star Wars movie is "Attack of the Clones"
you can nestle the wee-ones snug in simulated Tauntaun
fur while regaling them with the amazing tale of
"Empire Strikes Back".
Use the plush lightsaber zipper pull
on the Tauntaun sleeping bag to illustrate
how Han Solo saved Luke Skywalker
from certain death in the freezing climate
of Hoth by slitting open the belly of
a dead Tauntaun and placing Luke inside
the stinking (but warm) carcass.
If your kids don't change their tune on
which Star Wars film is the greatest ever,
you can do your best Jar Jar impression until they repent.
-Classic Star Wars sleeping bag
simulates the warmth of a Tauntaun carcass
-Built-in embroidered Tauntaun head pillow
-Plush Lightsaber zipper pull
-Printed intestines pattern on inside of bag
-Great for playing pretend "Save Luke from the Wampa" games
-Teach your children about the best Star Wars movie ever
-Fully Licensed Lucasfilm™ Collectible
-100% Polyester construction, Machine washable
-WARNING CHOKING HAZARD - Ages 3 and Up ONLY
-For indoor use only. Not suitable for camping.
-One size fits all.
Enough room for adults, plenty of space for kids
-Bag Dimensions - 33" x 67" (not including head pillow or legs)
(c) (2009) Lucasfilm Ltd . & TM. All Rights Reserved.
Graff Wars coming to a book store near you September 2010
Weekend fun part 1; Real People With Star Wars -Like Names
Weekend fun part 2; The angry conductor
Weekend fun part 3; Revok is very remorseful
Weekend fun part 4; Product placement
Weekend fun part 5; Jean Claude Van Damme´s scene in Breakin´
Weekend fun part 6; Lorenzo Lamas AKA Chilly D in Body Rock (1984)
Weekend fun part 7; This or that? (Black Sheep KIA Soul commercial)
Weekend fun part 8; Kermit the Frog and Cookie Monster Learn How to Rap
Weekend fun part 9; Darth Vader & Yoda recording voices for TomTom GPS devices
Weekend fun part 10; Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog mocks Star Wars fans.
Weekend fun part 11; Star Wars meets Gangster Rap
Weekend fun part 12; Jabba the fucking HAT!
Weekend fun part 13;
Classic Robot Chicken
(Arkhum Asylum Shawshank Redemption/Batman & Joker)
Weekend fun part 14;
All of Chewbacca's Dialogue from "Star Wars" by Doug Savage
Weekend fun part 15;
Antoine Dodson and his Bed Intruder song
Weekend fun part 16;
If your teacher corrected graffiti (Reas AOK/RIS)
Weekend fun part 17; Tauntaun Sleeping Bag
Weekend fun part 18; Star Wars Halloween costumes
Weekend fun part 19; LEGO® Star Wars™: Bombad Bounty
Weekend fun part 20; Vanilla Ice says...
Weekend fun part 21; Dogs That Look Like Chewbacca
Weekend fun part 22;
Kenny Keil’s; rappers who need to be seen in a comic book
Weekend fun part 23; Kanye West's Most Ridiculous On-Air Moments
Weekend fun part 24; “Family Guy: It’s A Trap!”
Weekend fun part 25; El Barto will never stop writing
Have a nice weekend ;)